nothing ever lasts forever
in the end you changed
there is no reason,
no sincerity. Take away
such a thing as love
tonight, i'll be crooked

leave me alone
i was alône anyway
i have no one,
everything is meaningless
take away the sugar-coated comfort
tonight, i'll be crooked

i scream and get dizzy
i vent out of boredom
to other couples
i start fights for no reason

a lonely island,
lost and wandering
the empty streets are
filled with those who are alone
unlike my heart,
the weather is so damn nice.

i used to believe in you
alone and i was happy
but like a joke, I am lèft alone.

i want to hide my pain
and become even more crooked
i'll spit towards the sky
you're scared of my crude
words and my rough eyes
but actually, I'm afraid

i want to go back but
i have nowhere to go
i want to love but no one to love
what am i supposed to do?

i remember the past
too much these days
and i won't lie that
i kind of miss it

it's the way of life that
i've known for 3 and a half years
it's not easy to forget
and im a little confused
is it selfish of me to want
to forget the past?
or atleast make it bearable
to remember

i felt so alone and lonely
when i was there

disconnected

everyone's so busy with
their lives and im stuck

i've lived a jetpack
and fastpaced world
when i was there because
it required alertness
and relentless moving

in the middle of it all,
i just stopped completely
i didn't know why i was
doing it anymore

i didn't even like it
some aspects were interesting
like the media and getting published
but it fades away pretty fast

it wasn't what i expected

and it took me 3 years to realise that.

now whenever i remember
what i used to do there's
this certain melancholia
filling my heart that's
bordering on nostalgia

i won't be able to be a photojournalist anymore
i won't go to isolated places
to see growth and development
all the memories i've had were precious
and to be honest, i wouldn't have
it any other way even if i did
end up leaving.

old memories will be replaced by new ones
im holding on to that.